I might not make a good banker/trader/accountant/cashier

I see smooth, shiny green apples packed in fives at the supermarket. I'm like "Ooooh", Granny Smith's and just 50,000 Vietnam Dong that makes 50 Singapore Cents. Cheap, cheap - so I buy them then I realize, Oh Crap - I paid a dollar for an apple. ( 1 SGD = 10,000 Dong approximately).

Yesterday I got food delivered, 42,000 dong right? So I give a 100,000 Dong note and a 2,000 Dong note and asks if she has a 50,000 one which she gives. I take my food and close the door, but not before her surprised look and "Thank you!" more enthusiastically than usual. I'm like, someone sure is happy today. 2 seconds later, I'm like FUCK.

I'm also real scroogey when I take the cab to work back and forth - minium average 28,500 Dong to work and slightly more back. When it goes to 33,000 and beyond - I get bloody uncomfortable and irrationally paranoid because I think the cab driver is taking me for a ride. Which has happened more than once. There was this guy in the same guest house - Australian I think, who got charged 40 USD for a ride which should have been well under 5 USD.

You guys think a couple cents is not a big deal? It damn right does, if you order every day. Plus, I lost about 1,100 SGD on the stock market which explains why I'm really tetchy about money lately. I got my intern allowance banked into my account one day and the next day is gone minus about 300 SGD more. Then the sales exec (who I consider a friend, but not a close friend) sitting next to me is asking how my stock is doing, he telling me his Vietnam Stock Holdings has declared a dividend and he is making profits. "Going up, going up?" I'm like er no, I want it to go down, I short sold. He doesn't understand, because he asks the same question again. Which kinda serves me right - i guess. Back home you guys would call me ghey Khiang, I know I know. Happened about 2-3 Weeks ago.

Hoes and Such

At about 70% of the clubs here, one can feel an atmosphere with a certain degree of Orchard Towers concentrate. So even at the regular clubs, you get plenty of working women. Happens less like this in Singapore, even if Attica now so I've heard has a couple of Thai working girls showing faces there.

I'm actually cool with prostituition. Well at least in the purest sense of a business transaction - money in exchange for sex. I'm not okay with the tarnished version - which I see a lot more, where now the transaction just doesn't involve sex per se, but in it the allowance to treat the lady with disrespect. Which is still not that bad, if the effects are contained within the transaction. There's however also something known as a spillover effect, where the many many men take it to mean that all the other non-working women around can be treated in the similar manner. Now, I have a major issue that.

Last night, we get this Cambodian working lady - who was quite beautiful in the dark. Then the lights flashed and I saw a pizza- like face under the lights and cake foundation. Her "boyfriend" was this overweight, greasy, drunk guy in his 50s. If you want a mental image, you could think Bam's Uncle in Viva La Bam. Or Borat, Borat's manager in the movie. You see this beautiful enchantress was trying to get a girl for a threesome. And she starting hitting on a friend I was with. ( In my opinion, she's was really cute - her apppearance was slightly andro-femme way, but she's straight - maybe my type, less lipstick lesbian) Which was flattering to her, till Ms Cambodia got a little to persistent this resulting in my friend making a disappearance to the toilet for a while). Ms Cambodia would be the femme fatale type, she would probably pick a less conspicuous girl so as not to steal the thunder in the bedroom. Again we were dancing in a group, and the annoying twat kept edging herself in the middle of our friends.

Okay, most my Viet girl friends are all shorter than me ( standing at 5'5; 5'7 in heels) which makes me the body guard when ugly foreign old men start fancying themself fanciable them to. Of course if the guy is hot, I step back discreetly as anyone in the secret service would know :) So yes, there I was warning off ( Tapping one of them on the shoulder glaring at him and motioning for him to move his fat ass) 2 separate instances one night fat old men last night - Korean, White dudes who were getting a bit to close to my friend. She's a couple years older than me, but I think she looks younger because of her size.

Sometimes I think, maybe it would be more fun to be at a place that was less "meat market". Plus the Music sucked ass. Oh yeah, meat market alright - I even saw 2 guys haggling furiously over price. He was getting worked up, screaming "fuck, this fucking that - I'm not going to pay that amount". His other friend was happy and already settled the price with the other girl. So I saw both of them ending the night with another pair of ladies.

Its an interesting place though. I lost key keys last night. And had to wake up early for work this morning. But I have a 2 hour spa treatment coming up. I'm happy.

Vung Tau

Trip out this weekend to the closest beach to Ho Chi Minh. About 2 - 3 hours out, depending on traffic. As said and heard by the many before me, not that fantastic a beach but its a change of scenery from the claustrophobic city. There's something I have to say about the City air though - people complain its polluted. I think its bollocks. Yeah, you've got the ever ubitiqious ninja chicks on bikes. Its not that bad. Friends have mentioned that Beijing is worse. I, for one think that the air in India is 2 CBM thicker with dust/unmentionable floating particles than it is here. Think stepping out to the neighbourhood shop, you could slide a finger tip on your cheek Voila, you can call yourself an artist. Or wear a collared white shirt, take it off at the end of the day - you get the stain of brown lovin' on the collar.

Also above, pictures of dog racing. Vietnam is a nation of gamblers. Yes, the government have banned the local vietnamese from the casinos here ( though I have to say that many have found ways around it) and they find other means of betting. Greyhounds are quite pretty, lean and I like them. Best thing about the trip was the seafood. Awesome, fresh and cheap. Headed there with a couple of local Vietnamese and French friends. I enjoyed myself, but was glad the weekend was over. Sometimes, its nice to get a weekend of rest. Oh yeah, throw in a massage given by quite young, strong looking lads =) The other chicks who are couple years older than me mentioned that my "guy" would have been quite happy with a smaller tip and reckoned that he would have massaged me for free anyway. I'm happy. Not happy as in the infamous happy ending happy. Mind you.

Headed out to one of the clubs there. Atrocious techno music. But still a nice sight to see people dancing without rythm. Respect for those who go out there and have fun, even if the sight is less than MTV-routine synchronized.

I Judge Thee Not

My General Sentiment

Of course, I’ve gone past the whole idealized, almost smug-state of “ I don’t judge”. Growing up, you finally realize that if you don’t make judgements, you would be living as a dunce in a constant state of flux and indecision. Oh come on, you need to judge whether people are good for you, worth your time, trust and love. You need to judge the cords need to be severed with a particularly heinous person/entity. Its completely acceptable and necessary to pass judgement. Pre-judgement as well. So the word prejudice really isn’t that big a taboo. Judegement, prejudice is mostly fine as long as you’re able to be flexible enough to re-evaluate your judgement when contrary evidence comes to light. It’s the rigidity in any sense is what that should be censured. I’m also not above passing a casual, albeit callous judgements on people I don’t care for or know that well. Rotten maybe,er so effing what?

The Problem

So really, the dilemma surfaces when you’re in a situation where you have to try to resist judging those you care about and “Others”. The latter being a grey area which is a little more than complicated – when you don’t necessarily love or care much for them but feel some sort of obligation, urge albeit unnatural not to pass such quick or harsh judgement on them. See, today I had lunch with an aquaintance (P) – the use of the word friend is strong, and in here used lightly. I would call him an acquaintence of affinity for. Let me qualify, nothing in a sexual or romantic sense. I recognize some sort of myself in him, or maybe maybe 3 or 4 years ago where I was honest bold and a lot more forthright – and naïve. Yes, now I’m a deceitful lil bitch who delights in releasing her pandora’s box of mind-fuck games.Okay,okay - not quite, but I’m not the same person.

But I’m resisting trying to pass judgement on his character, since he has honestly told me so. Plus, I did say – nah, don’t worry I don’t judge ( It shot right out of my mouth automatically, didn’t have time to stop it), when he said now you think I’m a bad guy.

Here’s some background. P is from the States sent here to work. P is shagging 2 women here concurrently, excluding the girlfriend he has back home. We’re having a discussion on women, men and getting laid in Saigon.He’s already told the 2 girls his situation, so he’s honest, he says. He describe the first girl. Small, cute, no tits, great kisser. Dodgy. Because she’s able to fly to Singapore and stay at the Mandarin 2 weeks straight. We speculare that she’s an escort or kept woman. Girl 2. Decent girl, your built, maybe more meat, big ass – I like big asses. Great tits,bad kisser. His words.

He’s an open book, he says. Meaning he’s honest. Well he’s been up front to them – I respect that. Till I heard he had a girl back home. Still not fazed. Open relationship, I ask. No, I don’t know, maybe she does. I glad he’s honest with the 2 girls here. But I can’t help but feel irked that its on a don’t ask, don’t tell basis.

Just a side comment/side note but not the main suhject of this entry. My stand on cheating – I understand and won’t judge if the cheating was done when relationships were strained. But cheating because you can (repeatedly), it’s a different story.So to the above title, in this case it does not hold true. While I won’t treat him differently as a friend and person (used loosely), sure as hell glad that I’m not his significant other – and would always remain on my platonic list till the end of the universe. Is that judgement passed? Er I don’t know. How terribly grey.